After 2 days of being in a weird negative/crazy/theatrical/overthetopfunk, I’ve decided to regroup and come back to Earth. I guess my crazy post from last week was a little taste at my human heart. For someone as positive as me and always having that “glass half full” attitude, it’s only normal that I fall off the wagon every now and then.
After taking a tour of the nutty house on Friday and talking to my friends, I realized that I hardcore overreacted about the whole LM thing.
Okay, guys. You and all my friends were right. I’ll give it to you. Cue eye roll.
I had the talk with LM and it all worked itself out. This is just a crazy time in his life and clearly it also is in mine too. He’s the first person I’ve even had a semi crush on in a while so after realizing how personal I took things last week, I decided to take a step back. Luckily, I didn’t dive into the deep end and say anything that I was feeling in my current state of mind to him. I have a big line that I don’t cross over when it comes to guys, especially newbies. That’s why I’m glad I did what any normal person would do and write/talk about it. Could you imagine if I went all “Carrie” on him for no reason? Thank God I’m not a crazy girl. No, seriously. Thank God.
So I decided to keep it super casual with LM. I think I was just freaking out because I’ve been lied to so many times that all I crave is a little bit of honestly-even with a friendship. And that’s all I want out of this little interesting part of my life: friendship. Friends. Who make out. A lot. Who cares? There’s no rules to hanging out with people. We’re both clearly in no state of mind to be “dating” or whatever the kids are calling it these days. We’ve already talked about our feelings and we’re on the same page so I don’t need any more justification than that. So now I have a really good looking friend who I talk to a lot. Go me!
Ugh. And in other boy news (because I just can’t escape them):
I had to work at a local firehouse on Saturday for Fire Prevention Month. I knew that setting up a table there was going to be a red flag to have someone come talk to me, but dammit it’s for the children! Leave me be! There was one firefighter who had taken a weird interest in me. He mentioned my tongue ring more times than I could count. Then he brought me to the trailer where they fill it up with smoke and then show the children how to “stop drop and roll.” At one point, he had closed one of the rooms off to fill it up with smoke and I was legit thinking, “Am I going to get touched inappropriately right now?” Haha, needless to say, I found any excuse to book it out of there. “Oh snap! There’s a fire!” At that point, I jumped out of the window in the back and landed safely on the ground. Saved by the smoke! Boy, that was awkward. Then at the end of the day he asked me for my information, to which I gave him all of my professional contact numbers and emails. There’s no way this dude will ask me out via work e-mail. Phew. Dodged a bullet there.
THEN on Friday, a guy I had met about 6 months ago texted me. I met him on my “first single night out” and I went a little crazy that night with the booze. I do remember him, however. In fact, I have a picture with him haha! He’s definitely cute. It was just SO random because we exchanged numbers and legit haven’t spoken since. So FF 6 months and he’s all like, “Wanna go out for drinks next week?”
I feel awful, but I said maybe. It has nothing to do with him. I’m just seriously SO TIRED OF FREAKING DATING. IM EXHAUSTED, DAMMIT! All of the liars, obnoxious men, users, missing teeth, and ill intentions. Girl needs a date-cation. And I’m full on taking one. The men aren’t going anywhere and neither am I. I would just rather work out and hang with my friends than waste another night being disappointed and coming out of a date night with just a buzz and nothing else. I mean, sure me and LM have fun together-but that’s why I like him. There’s no expectations. He’s the only one I’d spend my time with at the moment.
Who knows, though. I’m sure you guys know me by now in the sense that in a few weeks, I’m going to be dying to go on more dates and I’ll start that engine up again.
In the meantime, I need friends, family, whiskey, naps, and kisses from my new friend. That’s all that’s going to make me happy right now.