Upside Down

I have a soft spot for Zedd and ESPECIALLY for Haley Williams. That woman sounds like an angel.

I finally got to hang out with LM again the other night. We made plans and they actually followed through which was surprising but exciting. We just hung out at his house and listened to music/talked. I had such a good time. So much that my stomach has been tied in knots since then. This is the first person I’ve been remotely mentally attracted to since the ex. It’s thrilling and petrifying all at the same time. I know, I Know:

“Relax, Lara. Just let it roll and don’t think about it too much.”

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I’m honestly trying to. I hate being a girl, in the fact that I over think EVERYTHING. Not to mention, I worked very hard to acquire a psych degree. So, with my 2 “x” chromosomes and 1 BA in psychology, you can just call me an overthinking, overanalyzing mess.

Well, alright, I’m not THAT bad. But this guy can be kind of confusing. I think it’s a matter of communication. The 2 times I’ve seen him have been absolutely great. He’s sweet, funny, and I can tell by the look in his eyes that he’s into me. But his texts are…lacking? He usually texts me everyday. If this makes sense at all, he doesn’t have any personality in his texting/they lack emotion. They’re usually extremely short and to the point. MY texting is crazy. I think people can actually hear me through my words. I use emojis to the point where most of the time, I don’t even really need words. So, a lot of the times, I can’t figure out what he’s thinking or how he’s saying things. My best friend is like that. If you didn’t know him that well, you’d swear he was mad at you all the time by his texts: short, abrupt, and to the point. You’ll rarely get a “haha” and DEFINITELY no “:)” out of him. And since LM texts me everyday, what’s gonna happen on the day he doesn’t text me? Am I going to have a meltdown like a 14 year old girl?

See? This is how I know I like someone. I just wrote a paragraph about his TEXTING issues. Since I’m fully aware now how stupid all of this sounds, I’m going to step out of the crazy house for a while. I almost deleted this post, but I’m going to keep it as a reminder to take a chill pill.

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Let it be, Lara. Or you’ll end up like this.

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