Constant Conversations

This is my jam today. MY JAAAAAM.

Ah! Hello. I live. I write. I missed all of you.

I’ve been so terribly busy with school and the business of work that I’ve had no time to write. Not that I’ve had much to write about, anyways. Sure, I’m busy. But my written life seems like a bore compared to my living life.

I didn’t end up going to the Big E on Saturday. My friend from CT got drunk on Friday night and fell down a flight of stairs, so she couldn’t walk for a few days. Instead, me and a girlfriend drove down. We made dinner and got unnecessarily drunk off of whiskey and talked about life for the evening. All in all, a perfect Saturday.

Mmmkay. Now for what I love to talk about most (besides inspiration): Boys.

The Nerd: UMMMM. Boy, was my judgment SO wrong about this guy. After him texting me over the last several weeks seemingly sweet nothings and sounding so wholesome, I receive this text on Saturday at 7:35 PM:

The Nerd: Hey! Wanna f***?




Seriously, dude? At 7:30? Alas, The Nerd is no more. I’m not too sad about it. Another one bites the dust.

LM: He is just one man that throws me for a loop. I haven’t seen him since our first date last Sunday. He makes it a point to text me every day to see how I’m doing and TRIES to make plans with me, but fails miserably. It’s just constant conversations. See what I did there?

Here’s pretty much how it went:

Tuesday: Asked me LAST MINUTE, I had plans.
Wednesday: We made plans. He didn’t get home from the hospital until too late [no biggie]
Thursday: Asks me LAST MINUTE
Friday: I have plans
Saturday: I have plans
Sunday: I ask him, he has plans.
Monday: He says, “We should have made plans.”

Do you see a pattern here? It’s almost like he’s afraid to ask me to hang out slash he asks me WAY too late. I’m a very busy girl. He knows this. It isn’t a surprise. It’s a little frustrating, but I’m really big on taking things slow so I don’t mind the time apart. I honestly think he’s scared of me haha. Not in a bad way. Just intimidated. He already admitted that I make him nervous, which I don’t understand how? He’s older than me, more established, and seems to be more independent than I am. We actually made plans tonight-like, real ones. I’m going over his house to watch movies and drink tea. Sounds kind of cute, but I refuse to get my hopes up because if this dude cancels on me, I’ll be certain the Universe doesn’t want us to hang out.

And you know what? That’s fine with me. My boy craziness has taken a very dramatic downfall over the past few weeks. I hid my profile on Okcupid almost as fast as I made the damn thing. I’m just over it. I think I was trying to fill a small void. Clearly, I didn’t have any luck. But now that I’m talking to someone that I actually click with, and since I’m SO TIRED OF DATING, I’m back to my “space is good” self. I know that something will fall into my lap when I least expect it, so I’ve thrown all of my expectations out of the window.

Back to work. UGH. Hopefully I didn’t put anyone to sleep. I miss you guys. I’m still reading about your lives every morning. I promise I’ll write something of substance for you soon.




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