Online Dating and Too Many Dates.

Online Dating and Juggling Too Many Dates.

I figured I’d update you on my little online dating experience. I decided to try match.com for 30 days. I’ve been dabbling in free sites and honestly, most of the guys I’ve come in contact with only want sex and it’s starting to annoy me. Like, if I wanted sex that bad, I wouldn’t have to go online to get it. Really? Try a Friday or Saturday night in downtown Boston. Even the 2’s and 3’s can get laid on those nights. Even though I’ve been so against paying for a dating site, I figured that more men who actually want a relationship would be willing to actually pay for it.
I’ve been on Match for 4 days now and it definitely has a good mixture of pros and cons. First off, I cannot BELIEVE these men PAY for a dating site and STILL MESSAGE YOU “HI.” Honestly? No. You couldn’t be more creative than that? At all? That’s quite the possible reason these men are still single. Another thing I didn’t like was that it shows when people look at your profile. And not just when they look at it once-every time they look at it. Sometimes I need a good two or three times to really look at these guys’ profiles before I message them-I don’t need them thinking I’m a stalker. Besides getting bombarded by people sending me messages and “winking” at me (Like, really?), I haven’t found anyone yet who I’m interested in and who is interested in me just the same. One thing I’ll say about Match- after one day of going through the men I found attractive, they seem to have picked up my style and every morning when they send me my matches, at least half of them are totally my type. It’s only been 4 days, so I’m keeping positive about finding a few possible matches-I just have to be patient.
The only reason I’m a little relieved about the lack of connection on Match is because I have three (Yes, count them, THREE) dates in the next week and a half that are left over from the other dating site I tried. Dating stresses me out as it is, and now I have three of them in a row?! Thank God none of them are serial texters because I couldn’t handle having three different conversations with three potentials.
How does everyone else do it?! I don’t want to push the dates too far into the future. I don’t want these guys to think I’m a flake, but I also don’t want them to know I’m jugglin’ three of them. I’m supposed to have my first date tomorrow, but I think I’m going to push it to the weekend because I have too much stuff to do before Pennsylvania next week. So technically after I change that date, my first one is Thursday with The Ex Realtor. He’s a 30 year old tall, dark, and handsome man who used to be a realtor (thank you, Google) but he’s now a bartender a few towns away from me. I don’t know much else about him besides that. I’ve found in my experiences with online dating that no matter how much or how long you talk to someone, you really don’t know them until you meet them. Might as well save all of the small talk for the actual date. It’ll be better than trying to come up with any other ice breakers seeing as how usually I’ve been talking to them non-stop for weeks about absolutely everything. Nah, I’ll keep the mystery alive this time. So, I’ll be seeing the Ex-Realtor on Thursday for some drinks. Nothing like a big glass of Jameson on the rocks to calm the nerves. Here I go again.
P.S. For a single lady, I feel kind of ballin’ with my three dates. Chyeah.

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11 comments

  1. I just loved this post! I loved “even the 2’s and 3’s can get laid”. That was funny! But I fully agree with you on several things especially the part about actually meeting the person. No matter how long you chat online, they very often are completely different in person.

    But, it’s only your 4th day so it’s all good still! Keep positive and have fun.

    Good luck with the ex-realtor

    Lee

  2. Absolutely! Meeting new people is a good thing. A friend of mine told me I was so hasty and an “idealised” view of dating. So I started just wanting to be friends/acquaintances. That has worked for me and my whole idea of dating has now changed because I used to go on dates and think “Okay, this one is going to be my boyfriend”.

    1. Exactly!!! I try not to think too much into it. Obviously we can’t help but have that “is he a potential?” in the back of our minds, but as long as they’re not creepy and can actually carry a conversation-that’s all that matters to me for a first date haha!

  3. You can’t have too many dates! Hope they go well. Man, that really bugs me too, the site I’m trying does the same thing with profile views, it comes across creepy but I haven’t made many/any snap decisions on someone to be honest!
    It’s curious seeing it from your side, because I’m always wondering “What sort of message would this girl like to get and how can I get myself across like I want to?”
    I probably fail miserably but try to be inventive with it at least, good to know I’m doing something right there. It baffles me how so many people are so creepy just because the internet is between them and another REAL person. Ugh, I apologise for my sex.

    1. Haha exactly! I need to look at someone a good 5,000 times before I decide to message them. And honestly, if I like a guy’s profile and he attracts me, anything except for “Hi” will do it for me. Though, I like to be the go-getter and I usually always do the messaging first. HAHA and luckily I haven’t gotten many creepers lately except for the guy who messaged me this morning whose name is “hugeguy4u69” haha! Oh, men.

      1. Hahahaha oh wow, that guy was inventive. I’ll give him that :D. I actually like that, there should be more girls on dating sites like that. I’ve had so many people browse my profile multiple times and maybe 2 girls total actually message me first. Cowardly šŸ˜¦ meh, even online girls expect guys to approach them huh!

  4. Eh, I guess that’s the way this stupid world works. But hey, not everyone can be a go-getter! If you like those types of girls, those are the ones you should go for! 2 girls is better than no girls. There’s still hope for my female race šŸ™‚

  5. Excellent! Loved it. Those guys are the main #1 reason it is so hard for “normal” guys to get noticed. But at least you’re getting the “real” experience. And if you’re trying to figure out what to do with all of your date options, prioritize them by ones you’re really sure have a good chance and then by the ones that have potential but you’re not sold on yet. Just make lunch or coffee dates with the ones with potential but you’re not sold on yet. They’re quick, have a hard end time, and are great ways to weed out the herd. You’ll know whether you click or not, and what kind of guy he really is in person, without worrying about the normal dating pomp and circumstance. I tend to make most of my first dates quick lunch/coffee dates anymore. Much more efficient and less stressful. And then if I want another date, I have a better idea what to expect, and what to plan for the first big date.
    p.s. I HATE the Match.com subject line. I mean HATE it! Stupidest thing ever. I just put goofy stuff anymore. It seems Hi and Hello get about as much attention as putting something witty and thoughtful. So I just put something goofy.

    1. Ahh thanks for the advice šŸ™‚ yeah, I put my favorite thus far first on my metaphorical dating calendar. Afternoon coffee sounds PERFECT. I always regret having a date on a Friday or Saturday night because since so far none of them clicked, I missed opportunities to dance the night away in the city with my friends. Haha! And yeah, that subject line is awful. I especially loved a man who messaged me today with the headline “not desperate.” *shrugs* what is the deal with humanity?!

      P.S. your last post rocked my damn socks off. I legit started my work day to it. Forget those stupid movies and books about single moms and women and their dating scene. Mr. Mom is where it’s at. You’re my hero. Can’t wait for your next adventure šŸ˜‰

      1. Hero might be a little strong, but thank you! I try to be educational, as well as entertaining. And I’m also taking notes on what you’re saying, so I don’t make some of the same mistakes. Thanks again!!

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